There is this expectation–set by the depiction of sex in films and porn–that during heterosexual sex, men and women can, and indeed often, will come together. Another layer is that this will happen naturally through intercourse (depicted explicitly or represented somehow). And so men approach sex with the same expectation and that sets them up for some frustration.

Climaxing, or 'coming' together, through intercourse as an expectation also contributes to the pressure women feel to 'fake it.'

So that whole Durex campaign that seemed to imply that a new type of condom will ensure this utopian outcome, was quite annoying, given that Durex should know better. They do not. Or at least, they let their marketing folks to sell products that leverage a misplaced expectation, even though the product team would know better. Well, whatever be the dynamics within, it is not the best outcome, because Durex with its creative strength and production values is able to repackage the whole false promise and make it, well, 'sexier.'

The approach that maximises mutual pleasure has to be more holistic, and so we have this five-point plan that men can follow. As you will see it does not necessarily mean buying Misters products (although we will love it if you do buy those, and they will help, but they will only help in this mission in combination with the other steps. Those other steps are free advice, really. But really competent free advice.)

Have a read. Or a listen, for we covered this theme in a podcast too.

Read The Five-Point Plan

Listen on Spotify