Tapsee Pannu’s response on why she has not been invited to the popular talk show, Koffee With Karan, was the forthright, “My sex life isn’t interesting.”

It raises some interesting questions on what is an interesting [enough] sex life, and how the whole sex positivity movement—which aims to remove the taboo associated with conversations about sex—may be missing the point that sex lives are what they are. And so long as the two people (or, yes, whatever number of people) who are directly concerned are fine, it is really nobody else’s business.

However, as the most interesting conversations about sex are about unconventional sex lives, there seems to be some marginalising of people who just want regular stuff, and are happy with it.

We see this issue come up often in conversations about marriage where supposedly liberal sex-positivity advocates can’t talk about marriage and sex for a few minutes before bringing up ‘open marriages.’ Acceptance of polyamory—or any other label that people choose—is one thing, and considering it panacea for all challenges something altogether different.

Yes, an open marriage will make for more interesting conversation, and therefore more views, but that can’t mean that the person who values what might be the social norm has no stories to tell.

There can’t be a threshold for interesting when it comes to sex lives. Some people just do not want ‘interesting.’ And that’s absolutely fine.

A couple who have figured that all they want between them is the my missionary position might be getting as much as, or more or less joy from it than another that is committed to going through the Kamasutra in a fortnight.

There are several—more basic—milestones to cross in our collective view of sex as a theme. Marginalising what we consider regular is a sure fire way to not open up the conversation!