Are sex toys the pleasure bearer or the troublemaker? If you are battling with this question in your head, wondering which role do these harmless toys play in your relationship, chances are you have already had your stint with them. The multi-faceted toys are slowly changing the sex game around the world, even to the extent that couples are beginning to experiment with them openly during their most private moments. While some couples like to experiment, many others feel that their intercourse is incomplete without the use of a rubber dildo or a plugging. Can these toys drive your sex drive up or leave you high and dry? How popular are sex toys?

Despite being popular and in demand, people continue to have their inhibitions about these toys. The biggest fear men feel “ Will I be replaced by a sex toy?” Imagine being in such a situation yourself, wherein you feel your partner will also vote in favour of a sex toy instead of the real thing. Some people might find this thought ungrounded and a little inconvenient to digest.

Nevertheless, this fear rules the minds of a lot of men, who seem to eye their rubbery counterparts with utter distrust.

Simply put, most men want to feel capable enough to satiate their partner’s sexual desires. They want to feel like they are good in bed, and in a position to satisfy their partners. When a sex toy comes into the picture, it might give your man’s ego a jolt, which might not go down too well with his psyche.

On the contrary, women have been conditioned time and again to avoid expressing their inner most fantasies, especially, if these revolve around self-pleasure and sex toys. When such inhibitions have made a permanent home in a person’s head, chances are there would be lesser compatibility between partners.  In other words, one can often say that it is all about perspective of both the partners. While the man might feel threatened, the woman might feel liberated by taking matters into her own hands (literally).

However, having that initial trust and confidence with each other can take the relationship to another level. Who knows, once the initial discomfort zone is behind you, both the partners might feel comfortable enough to enjoy the use of sex toys. Either these will liberate them both, or just become the reason for contention and end up spoiling the relationship eventually.

Is being open-minded a pre-requisite for using sex toys? Having the initial conversation is a little daunting, depending on how you broach the subject with your partner. To make your partner comfortable, you might need to address their insecurities about using a dildo or a vibrator while having sex and then take it on from there. However, rest assured, the continuous use of sex toys or the addiction to use them when you are alone can be a little dangerous, so you should limit their use when alone. In the end, it is all about your perspective, and the broader your horizons, the better would be your relationship, on and off the bed.

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