Romance and routine are an oxymoron, even inimical to each other. But like many other surprises that life keeps in store for us, it is this oxymoron that makes couples happy in long term partnerships - marriage or otherwise.
In this fast-paced world, with both partners working full time which includes coming home late, it is how they spend the little time before bed, together, that makes all the difference. Whether spent in quietude or eloquence, the deep bonding during these nightly hours is what will help you keep the love and passion aflame and save your relationship from losing the sheen.
To give you cues we have enlisted some habits which happy couples follow before bedtime -
1. Sharing is caring
Tell each other about your day’s events sharing both the good and bad. This will help you reconnect every day after the long hassling working hours and make you feel like a team that are into the relationship boat together. However, this is not the time to embark on serious discussions or to make major life decisions. Schedule such somber things, for weekends.
2. Treat each other
Good things often come in small packages. A scoop of your wife’s favourite butterscotch served in her choice of ceramic bowl right after dinner, can win you some strong brownie points as a husband. These little gestures of TLC, like that of a trek downstairs to the freezer to fetch ice lollies, go a long way in cementing the bond for years.
Post marriage date nights, also help in making meaningful and deep conversations and help in relaxing in a better way than what you could do sitting at home. Dinner at home and doing the dishes together have their charms. Still, enjoying a delicious meal at a fine dining restaurant or even at a local joint you frequented during your dating days, will uniquely invigorate the romance. On days you are having dinner at home, share the chores, or keep each other company. Also, if your wife does the cooking, fix her a drink, not necessarily alcoholic.
Another lovely way of day to day bonding is taking a night stroll in the neighbourhood. Holding hands while walking will make the affair more vivid.
3. Make TV time together time
Nothing works better than binge-watching your favourite shows or old romantic flicks together, with popcorn and coke for company. Make this your weekend story, and see how you feel irrevocably bonded for life. Add snuggles aplenty.
4. Make the bedroom a gadget & argument free zone
Mobile phones are one of the greatest killjoys when it comes to love, care, and bonding. This great ‘distracter’ is capable of creating rifts between most devoted lovers, if not handled with caution. The bedroom is one place where the presence of this menace is an absolute no.
Once you decide to call it a day, go into the bedroom, leaving your cell phone in the living space. This will ensure that bedtime is spent in the best way - that is - by chatting, cuddling, and falling asleep together, holding hands.
Fights and conflicts are integral to relationships. But they need not be necessary to your bedroom affairs; sort things out before, to enter the bedroom with a clear and peaceful mind. Going to bed irritated hampers sleep, gives nightmares and affects the morning mood. But before you do so, don’t forget to utter the most pristine words - “I love you” and “goodnight.” These sweet little nothings are, in reality, the fulcrums of your bond and help you stay strong together.
On occasions of going to bed separately, the one staying up should tuck the other in. Silly as it may sound, it is also a lovely thing to do for your significant other.
5. Get it on
Physical touch and intimacy are the ultimate ways of bonding. But this does not always have to be sexual. Holding each other in a deep embrace can make you feel more strongly connected than sexual acts. A lingering, soft, and romantic kiss does a better job in relaxing your strained nerves than therapies at the most exotic spas can ever do. Besides, it sets the tone for couples in bed by awakening sexual desire and arousal.
That said, sexual pleasure and intimacy also play a major and vital role in relaxation and de-stressing and helps couples bond at a deeper level.
Who could have ever thought that routine can actually break the monotony!